The obit only gave her name, dates of birth and death, said she had been living in Milwaukee, and listed her surviving relatives. That was it. When I wrote about Michelle before, I didn't talk about her issues with drugs. She had them. I never thought she was addicted to anything but that's such an easy spiral to go down, especially when you've used for years. I don't know what happened to Michelle, but I would put money on her death being drug related. It completely breaks my heart.

I've been reaching out to old friends (whom I haven't seen or talked to in 14 years or so) via Facebook over the last few days trying to piece together what happened. So far I can't find anyone who kept in touch with her longer than I did. I feel like I need to know to have some closure. I will call her dad if I have to, but I'm trying to avoid that if I can.

In the meantime, I am profoundly sad. I can't believe that she was in Milwaukee and I couldn't find her. I can't believe that no one else seemed to know she was there either. And I can't believe that she's gone. Michelle was a dear friend whom I loved tremendously, even when I didn't know where she was. And if she had not introduced me to Dude all those years ago, my life would be wholly different right now. I cannot think of another friend who has had this significant of an influence on my life. 

I don't know what else I can write here. I'm just sad and stunned and... everything.